We can make all sorts of crazy laws!

House approves flag-burning amendment

Boy: Hey, who left all this garbage on the steps of Congress?

Amendment: I'm not garbage, kid.
I'm an amendment to be
Yes an amendment to be
And I'm hoping that they ratify me
There's a lot of flag burners
Who have got too much freedom
I wanna make it legal for policemen
To beat 'em 'cause there's limits to our liberty
At least I hope and pray that there are
'Cause those liberal freaks go too far

Boy: But why can't we just make a law against flag burning?

Amendment: Because that law would be unconstitutional
But if we CHANGED the Constitution...

Boy: Then we could make all sorts of crazy laws!
Amendment: Now you're catching on!

Bart: What the hell is this?

Lisa: It's one of those campy 70s throwbacks that appeal to Generation X-ers

Bart: We need another Vietnam. Thin out their ranks a little.

Boy: But what if people say you're not good enough to be in the Constitution?

Amendment: Then I"ll crush all opposition to me
And I'll make Ted Kennedy pay
If he fights back
I'll say that he's gay

Congressman: Good news, Amendment! They ratified you.
You're in the U.S. Constitution!

Amendment: Oh yeah! Door's open, boys!

The Day the Violence Died

Do not fuck with Daniel M'Mburugu.

He'll mess your shit up.

Awesomeness.

General J.C. Christian, Patriot is launching an operation, dubbed Yellow Elephant to talk young Republicans into signing up to help addrss the U.S. Army's little recruiting problem. Check it out, in particularly this exchange with the Young G.O.Pers from Spokane. Made my day.

The kids from Downing Street

I wanted to mention the key revalations contained in the Downing Street memo for posterity's sake.

"1. By mid-July 2002, eight months before the war began, President Bush had decided to invade and occupy Iraq.

"2. Bush had decided to 'justify' the war 'by the conjunction of terrorism and WMD.'

"3. Already, 'the intelligence and facts were being fixed around the policy.'

"4. Many at the top of the [U.S.] administration did not want to seek approval from the United Nations (going 'the U.N. route').

"5. Few in Washington seemed much interested in the aftermath of the war."

Salon

My anti-drug is booze. What?

Like everybody else ever, I've got a fair number of musical skeletons in my closet. It shouldn't be a big deal that my adolescent CD collection included dregs like the first Collective Soul and Barenaked Ladies albums: I grew up in a small town and music never had much of a presence in my life and, consequentially, one naturally went along with what was big at the time. Fortunately, I grew out of it and I'm pretty sure my cringe-worthiest musical choices are behind me, which is more than a lot of people can say. However, it's pretty goddamn gratifying to see so much of the undeniably bad shit I listened to back in the day turn up on an upcoming seven disc Rhino Records '90s compilation. This '90s nostalgia bullshit is great, 'cause now I can pretend to be all ironic when I belt out the "Aw-wa-ha!"s in Better Than Ezra's "Good", even though I'm, like, totally digging it. Unironically.